The perception that many women have of men is that they simply want to seduce her, she becomes something to be hunted and then her photo hung on a trophy wall for other men to admire the prowess of the man and his abilities to conquer women.
The trouble is that very few women find this appealing, and it really hurts a woman when she feels she is just an object whose only purpose in life is to be desired by men for her looks. Every woman wants to be loved and appreciated, and in a woman’s mind she isn’t a bimbo to hang on a man’s arm and make him feel good.
Dating is more than seduction, a first date may lead to intimacy by the end of the evening, but this is not the purpose of the date. Dating is fun, but it has a serious undertone, to find the person you might want to enter a relationship with, perhaps even make a lifelong commitment to.
Men who ask women on dates with the intention of seducing her are in most cases lying to her. She thinks he likes her and if all goes to plan she’s already thinking of a second or third date, it’s unlikely she’s planning to be seduced on that first date. Men who seduce women on the first date often don’t call for a second date, is this fair?
The key difference between seduction and dating is the intention of the two people, in a seduction the purpose always leads to intimacy, and the intention is for this to happen fairly quickly. In a dating situation intimacy is present, but isn’t expected until both feel that the time is right.
Sadly, many men are confused about the differences, often they’ll read up on seduction techniques, attend seduction seminars, be envious of the men who make the art of seduction their business. Sadly, many women don’t even suspect that the man who asked them on a date is actually only interested in seducing them.
In fact the real difference between dating and seduction is the honesty of the situation. Seducing another person is dishonest if their expectations are different. Asking a woman out on a date without clarifying your intentions leads to hurt and upset on her part, it’s the sort of behavior that gives men a bad reputation.
Decent men ask women on dates and accept that if the time is right that intimacy might follow, unscrupulous men try to seduce women for their own goals. Both activities seem similar, two people meet and go out for dinner, a movie, a walk in the park, but the expected outcome is very different, and women like men who respect them enough to accept that intimacy happens when BOTH partners want it.
Andy is a professional writer with varied interests including relationships and dating. He also recently wrote the LED desk light guide with information for people wanting to by a gooseneck desk light.
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